Category Archives: List

All I Really Need to Know I Learned From Arrested Development

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Arrested Development, quite possibly the most finely crafted series ever to hit television screens, is slated to return any day now. With all fourteen new episodes to be released on Netflix at once, we’ve been excitedly re-watching, reading about, speculating and incessantly quoting for months (years) now. And though it seems like this will probably be a standalone run with no plans announced to produce a follow-up movie or further seasons, I hope the executives at Netflix have nonetheless anticipated our anticipation, lest their massive servers be brought down by our cultish traffic. No matter what happens, the Bluths and their Balboa mythos in the O.C. have already indelibly altered our lives and philosophical outlook, for better or worse. Because they understand more than you’ll… never know.

All I really need to know I learned fromarresteddev

  1. Always leave a note.
  2. Feel the hot sting of sweat in your eyes from an honest day’s work.
  3. Curl up in a ball and remain motionless when confronted.
  4. I’d rather be dead in California than alive in Arizona.
    Arrested Development - Jessica Walter
  5. Never give up animation rights.
  6. Hermano means brother.
  7. Don’t yell.
  8. Never promise crazy a baby.
  9. Vodka goes bad once it’s opened.
  10. You want your belt to buckle, not the chair.
  11. Do not be afraid to ride her. Hard.
  12. It’s okay to take a little something from work.
  13. The blue part of the map is land.
    alg-arressted-develpment-will-arnett-jpg
  14. Do not order the Skip’s Scramble.
  15. Don’t leave the door open with the air conditioning running.
  16. This close they always look like landscape. But nope, you’re looking at balls.
  17. Children should be neither seen nor heard.
  18. It’s the poor craftsman who blames his tools.
  19. You’re gonna get some hop-ons.
  20. Annyong is Hello.
  21. When you can do this without getting punched in the chest, you’ll have a lot more fun.arrested-development-season-4
  22. It ain’t easy being white, it ain’t easy being brown…
  23. Never touch the Cornballer!
  24. Sometimes a diet is the best defense.
  25. It’s called ‘taking advantage.’ It’s what gets you ahead in life.
  26. A Fake Popemobile doesn’t stop real bullets.
  27. Wine only turns into alcohol if you let it sit.
  28. Buy all your cars at police auctions.
  29. Buy yourself a tape recorder and just record yourself for a whole day. I think you’re going to be surprised at some of your phrasing.
  30. arrested-development-tv-shoow-image-blue-tobias-01Don’t pit your sons against each other.
  31. Portugal is in South America.
  32. Take the foil off the ding-dong before putting it in the microwave.
  33. If you give a man a fish, he’ll eat for a night, but if you teach a man to fish, he’ll want to use your yacht.
  34. Thou shalt protect thy father, and honor no one above him, unless it be-eth me, thy sweet Lord.
  35. The only scary thing about a one-armed man trying to scare someone is the fact that he feels his one arm is only good for trying to scare somebody.

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  1. When life hands you a chance to be with someone special, you just grab that brownish area by its points and you don’t let go no matter what your mom says.
  2. A trick is something a whore does for money. Or cocaine candy.
  3. If there’s still plenty of meat on that bone, take it home, throw it in a pot, add some broth, a potato. Baby, you’ve got a stew going.
  4. The jury is still out on science.
  5. Too many lives have been ruined because some cheap waitress at a HoJo’s said she used an IUD.
  6. Faith is a fact.
  7. You gotta lock that down.
  8. British Parliament has three Houses.
  9. If you have a son, either take him to the cabin in the woods, or promise to take him and then not take him. But never not tell him that you’re taking him to a cabin in the woods and then not take him.
  10. Don’t teach lessons.
  11. NO TOUCHING!
  12. Life is about making difficult sandwiches.
  13. Family is the most important thing.
  14. Breakfast is the most important thing (of the things you eat).
  15. There’s always money in the banana stand.
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14 INSULTING LOVE SONGS

heartThis Valentine’s holiday, remember to take special care for the thoughts and feelings of your spouse or significant other. And also be careful to ensure that your words, actions and gestures can’t be taken as backhanded compliments, mixed signals, or even veiled threats. Many a promising affair has been aborted too soon by an unseemly, often unintended, insult.

This list of derogatory love songs isn’t necessarily about couples fighting, arguing, exploiting, cheating, breaking up, breaking hearts, or falling out of love. Each of those topics do cross over, of course, but could fill entire lists of their own. I believe I read some statistic somewhere that something like 152% of all songs written are love songs, so there was bound to be ample evidence of disparaging or downright offensive lyrics, whether intentional or not.

For the sake of brevity, I haven’t included any hip-hop songs, though their declarations of love are storied with unfortunate metaphor and sexist symbolism.

  1. It’s All Right With Me

Ella Fitzgerald’s song about ‘the other man’ is sort of about cheating, but she’s not addressing her devoted partner, but that secret lover that one would find so tempting.

There’s someone I’m trying so hard to forget
Don’t you want to forget someone too?

As someone who has been ‘the other man’ before, it is pretty disrespectful to be told that you are playing second-fiddle, or perhaps the rebound, or the distraction, for the head honcho who’s officially claimed your lover’s heart. Whether or not the subject in the song is aware of his role in this infidelity makes some small difference, but the insinuation is hurtful either way.

And hey, what do you mean by strangely attracted!?

  1. A Fine Romance

Surely an example of one of the first sarcastic love songs, this 1936 Jerome Kern and Dorothy Fields song was used in the Fred Astair and Ginger Rogers film Swing Time.

These two are essentially discussing the difficulties of their “relationship”, but we all know how much Fred and Ginger (in-character) are really head-over-heels for one another. The sniping would’ve been pretty cute, if it didn’t reveal some tawdry innuendos about their lackluster love life.

A fine romance, with no kisses

So far, it has all the passion of a Rodney Dangerfield one-liner…

…you’re as cold as yesterday’s mashed potatoes
A fine romance, you won’t nestle
A fine romance, you won’t wrestle

I– never mind.

I might as well play bridge
With my old maid aunt

Damn, dude. Just– damn.

A fine romance, my good fellow
You take romance, I’ll take Jell-o
You’re calmer than the seals
In the Arctic Ocean
At least they flap their fins
To express emotion

Hey, maybe she’s into that. Ew.

In the film version, their ‘fine romance’ also has the complication of previous engagements, compulsive gambling, lies, a love quadrangle, missed connections and procrastinations. Who would ask for any other convoluted love story to tell the grandkids?

  1. I Got it Bad and That Ain’t Good

It’s all in the title.

Songs about negligent and/or abusive loves who don’t treat you ‘sweet and gentle the way they should’ could fill an entire catalogue of their own. But when you’re so deeply in love, and yet somehow still lucid enough to realize that it’s a bad situation to be in, you need to accept some outside help.

And when she says:

He don’t love me like I love him, nobody could…

Does she mean that no one else has the potential for a love as monumental as hers (including him), or that she’s the only one foolish enough to fall for such a loser?

  1. Use Me

So while I actually do find this Bill Withers song pretty endearing (not to mention steamy), in which a man fends off the criticisms of his friends and family about his lady love, the underlying theme is one of masochism, and possibly a dangerously co-dependent relationship (see also: any Annette Hanshaw song).

…my answer yeah to all that ‘use me’ stuff
Is I want to spread the news that if it feels this good getting used
Oh you just keep on using me until you use me up

Eeew. Listen, if I’m your brother, I do not want to hear about how your girlfriend *ahem* used you.

He doesn’t even defend his special lady from these allegations, because he doesn’t disagree with their shit-talk at all. He just happens to enjoy the things that others, in their misguided wisdom, see as twisted and wrong.

It would be one thing if the context of hot, hard use were relegated to kinky bedroom activities, but he seems to allow and even get off on being treated ill in every-day social settings:

Oh sometimes yeah it’s true you really do abuse me
You get in a crowd of high class people and then you act real rude to me
But oh baby baby baby baby when you love me I can’t get enough

Notice that he doesn’t put up with her abuse because she has an otherwise effervescent personality, or a brilliant mind, or she’s a misunderstood monster, or even rude to him in particular but kind to children, animals and waitstaff… no, it’s specifically her naughty nighttime skills that make all this pain and suffering worth it.

…but it all depends on what you do
It ain’t too bad the way you’re using me

Could it be sexy Stockholm syndrome? Sounds like somebody needs to read 50 Shades of Grey instead.

  1. Love the One You’re With

Proving that the progressive movements of the nineteen-sixties were not without their own forms of misogyny, Stephen Stills belted out this free love anthem to hundreds of thousands of mud-covered fellow travelers, many of whom had trekked to Woodstock without getting a ticket for their freaky mama or man.

If you’re down and confused
And you don’t remember who you’re talking to

Like, woah, man, I wonder why that might be?

…your baby is so far away

This is what’s known as “rationalization.”

And if you can’t be with the one you love, honey
Love the one you’re with

Well, heck, any old person will do! That’s what love is all about, right, Charlie Brown? Just reach out and touch someone! The next lines at least establish the parameters of consensual love:

…a girl right next to you. And she’s just waiting for something to do…

‘I’m bored, wanna fuck?’ Now, the song doesn’t necessarily advocate cheating, per se. The ‘one you love’ in question may just be an unrequited crush, or imaginary ideal, or even Jodie Foster. But that means that the ‘one you’re with’ is simply a hole for your temporary amusement. Well, she may even be fine with this arrangement, but to frame her as a consolation prize… I mean, I don’t know any woman who is turned on by the words ‘Eh, you’ll do.’

Turn your heartache right into joy
Cause she’s a girl and you’re a boy

Yep. That’s all it takes. Unless you’re in the LGBT community. Or also, y’know, have standards.

By the way, I don’t even want to know what “rose in the fisted glove” means. Yeesh.

  1. Run for Your Life

Old blues and country standards are known for men professing their love for a woman with such romantic gestures as threatening to fucking kill her. You’d think that by the ’60s and ’70s we might have overcome our baser urges. And though this Beatles song from Rubber Soul was most likely a tongue-in-cheek tribute to that trope, I feel as though most people enjoy the jaunty ditty without ever acknowledging the horrifying lyrics.

Well I’d rather see you dead, little girl
Than to be with another man…

Personally, I’d rather see her happy than dead, but what do I know?

You better run for your life if you can, little girl
Hide your head in the sand little girl
Catch you with another man
That’s the end’a little girl

At least the potential homicidal maniac is self-aware of his little foibles:

Well you know that I’m a wicked guy
And I was born with a jealous mind
And I can’t spend my whole life
Trying just to make you toe the line

Because if you can’t make your woman toe the line, she’s broken and must be murdered.

And in case you had any question to the sincerity of his words (they are, after all, a little hyperbolic):

Let this be a sermon
I mean everything I’ve said
Baby, I’m determined
And I’d rather see you dead

  1. You’re The One For Me, Fatty

Not only does he belittle his beloved repeatedly in the song with his economical lyrics, in typical Morrisey fashion he also makes the issue about himself by getting all needy and self-doubtful:

Promise you’ll say
If I’m in your way
You’re the one for me, fatty

I didn’t include ‘Fat Bottom Girls‘ because a) he’s not idolizing any one fatty, but all the fatties of the world, b) I’m pretty sure that no girl, fat or not, would have been Freddie Mercury’s cup-o-tea, and c) that song is clearly a genuine and sincere appreciation of big-bodied women. They do indeed make the rockin’ world go ’round.

  1. Amie

I can see why you think you belong to me
I never tried to make you think
Or let you see one thing for yourself

So here’s a guy who has given mixed messages to his girl, both putting down her ability to think on her own and admitting that he was controlling her in some way. That is Pure Prairie League, man.

But now you’re off with someone else and I’m alone
You see I thought that I might keep you for my own

Oh, now I get it. Now that she’s with somebody else, our protagonist realizes what life is like without her. He just wants what he can’t have! It’s not even about her at all! He doesn’t spend one second of the song praising her personage, intellect, humor, or even her beauty (which is what most love songs go for).

Amie, what you wanna do?
I think I could stay with you
For a while, maybe longer if I do

I mean, Iunno. Whatevs. Leave that other guy for me and I promise you that I will commit to sort of liking you sometimes and showing up at your place at my convenience. There’s nothing a woman finds more attractive than wishy-washiness in a man. It doesn’t help that they end the song with the repeated refrain of:

I’d keep fallin’ in and out of love with you

Gee, what a lucky goil.

  1. Ruby

Ruby, don’t take your love to town

I can’t think of anything more special than immediately insinuating that your special someone is a whore.

So, right of the bat, I do feel bad for this guy. He just came back from that ‘old crazy Asian war’, or more accurately ‘atrocity-filled and unnecessary Vietnam police action.’ He tells this girl, who may or may not have been waiting for him, it seems, that he’s “not the man I used to be.” And with all the PTSD and ‘Nam flashbacks, I don’t think this is the best sweet talk. He grouses and moans about nobody wanting a mutilated amputee veteran, and pathetically opines that he just “needs some company”.

It’s hard to love a man
Whose legs are bent and paralysed
And the wants and the needs of a woman your age
Ruby, I realize,
But it won’t be long, I’ve heard them say, until I’m not around

Jeez, okay, we get it. You’re not exactly Casanova right now. Do you think it might not be your handicap, but your attitude? I missed the part where pity was supposed to be foreplay. And while I feel awful that society and the wretched U.S. government leaves its veterans out to dry, just because he’s done his “patriotic chore”, that doesn’t mean that Ruby’s “patriotic chore” is to pleasure or service your demanding ass. And if you really did realize the ‘wants and needs of a woman her age’ (shades of the chauvinistic assumption that weak-willed women are slaves to their hormones), then you’d step– *erm* –roll aside and let her live her own life!

This– this is where the song takes a sudden turn.

And if I could move I’d get my gun
And put her in the ground
Oh Ruby
Don’t take your love to town

Oh, country music. You old reprobate, you! How I wish that The Gambler or perhaps even The Coward of the County would show up and teach this old horny toad a lesson or two in the mannerly way to treat a Lady.

  1. Until the Real Thing Comes Along


So, Dean. What have you got for us?

‘d wait for you

Good so far…

I’d slave for you

That’s a tad extreme, but fine…

I’d be a beggar or a knave for you

Um, not really sure that’s necessary, but okay…

If that isn’t love, it’ll have to do

Aww, kind of sweetly modest…

Until the real thing comes along!

Wait– What? So… you’ll do anything for this woman, literally anything… unless a woman to be determined later comes along that you end up liking more? That is… fucked up, Deano. Is she just, like, your place-holder, or something? What about all the other words? Were those all lies??

I’d lie for you

Did those words mean NOTHING?

With all the words, dear, at my command
I just can’t make you understand

At this point it just sounds like a lot of empty promises and sweet nothings, in an overcompensating attempt to convince some woman that he is committed.

My heart is yours
What more can I say?

  1. If You Wanna Be Happy

This one speaks for itself:

If you wanna be happy
For the rest of your life,
Never make a pretty woman your wife,
So from my personal point of view,
Get an ugly girl to marry you.

A pretty woman makes her husband look small
And very often causes his downfall.
As soon as he marries her
Then she starts to do
The things that will break his heart.
But if you make an ugly woman your wife,
You’ll be happy for the rest of your life,
An ugly woman cooks her meals on time,
She’ll always give you peace of mind.

Don’t let your friends say
You have no taste,
Go ahead and marry anyway,
Though her face is ugly,
Her eyes don’t match,
Take it from me she’s a better catch.

Now look. If this song were about accepting and loving somebody regardless of their appearance, or appreciating them for their inner beauty, it might still be a little insulting, but still a well-meaning message overall. Instead, this song manages to be superficial and shallow to both attractive and unattractive women. Pretty girls will hurt you, and ugly girls have no hope of finding better, so they’ll stay at home and cook for you. As if it would be impossible for an “ugly” girl to commit adultery, or have a bad personality. As though there are no “pretty” women who are kind, generous, witty, caring, or faithful.

Say man.
Hey baby.
Saw your wife the other day.
Yeah?
Yeah, she’s ugly.
Yeah, she’s ugly but she sure can cook.
Yeah? Okay.

And what makes you so great, asshole? You don’t really seem like the most self-secure man on the planet.

  1. Different Drum

I respect any consenting adult’s decision to explore open relationships, to honestly play the field, or just be a generally ethical slut. But this classic Linda Ronstadt tune from 1967 reads more like an excuse to blow off some pushy sycophant.

Oh don’t get me wrong
It’s not that I knock it
It’s just that I am not in the market
For a boy who wants to love only me

I’m more into guys who are… you know… kind of… whores.

Yes, and I ain’t saying you ain’t pretty
All I’m saying is I’m not ready
For any person place or thing
To try and pull the reins in on me

Hey, it’s not you, it’s me! Really! I’d be no good for you! I just can’t be tied down right now! I don’t need some needy little pissant trying to get with me. Get it?

So good-bye I’ll be leaving
I see no sense in this crying and grieving
We’ll both live a lot longer
If you live without me

So, go on now. Scoot. Go find a girl that will put up with you. Because you can’t handle this.

  1. Better Man

I hesitated to add this song, of course, because it’s so tragic and beautiful. But the implication of not being able to find a better man is pretty psychotic, when you think about it. She’s most definitely denigrating her own prowess (she really can’t do any better?), but it’s not a great vote of confidence for the man, either, that she thinks he couldn’t handle the truth about her nagging doubts and feelings.

She lies and says she’s in love with him… can’t find a better man

That’s a pretty horrible secret to keep from your boyfriend. And it doesn’t say much for either of your relationship or communication skills. He can’t intimate her emotions at all, and she’s more content living a lie than upsetting his fragile confidence.

She loved him, yeah, she don’t want to leave this way
She feeds him, yeah, that’s why she’ll be back again

This might be why she can’t find a better man. Most people wouldn’t put up with that shit.

  1. My Funny Valentine

I wouldn’t actually find this sort of thing that insulting, really. I mean, if you appreciate somebody for their weaknesses, quirks, or eccentricities, that’s much more meaningful than simply having an unrealistic ideal of your loved one (which is what most songs, poetry, and romance fiction is interested in). If you have a deeper understanding of that person, you’ll appreciate them every day, for every wrinkle, freckle and dimple. You want to find someone who doesn’t want to change you, but loves you just as you are.

In the above clip, however, Ole Blue Eyes just lays it on so thick as this poor, hapless girl just sits there and takes it. And what can she do? He’s the Chairman-of-the-freaking-Board! Even if she did muster the guts to find fault with, say, his drinking, or his family matters, or his portrayal of Pvt. Angelo Maggio in From Here to Eternity, he’d probably have just hauled off and slapped her.

Some people, you see, are not capable of love.

So the next time you’re putting together a playlist for your sweetheart, don’t just simply compliment their eyes and breasts. Tell them how much you deeply, sincerely, genuinely, truly, honestly appreciate their eyes and breasts.

Happy V.D., y’all!

Holiday Santacular!

1284487009_bottom_krampusThe Stranger celebrates the holidays with four hours of radio; celebrating New Year’s Eve, Christmas, Saturnalia, and our recent triumph over Doomsday — all in one! We’ll review the past year’s current events, look forward to the progress of tomorrow, and how we might just be doomed after all. Then, we’ll finally get to hear from the fabled South Side Santa once again, to discuss FOX’s War on Christmas and other festive topics, all set to the traditional sounds of Yule.

Stranger in a Strange Land 2012-12-29: Santacular! by The Stranger on Mixcloud

PSIONIC PLAYLIST
Yuri-G – PJ Harvey
Don’t Look Back In Anger – Oasis
Teotihuacan -Noel Gallagher
Christmassteps -Mogwai
Sweet Leaf -Black Sabbath
The Little Drummer Boy -Jimi Hendrix
God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen -Dio
He Loved Him Madly (Bill Laswell Mix) -Miles Davis
The Stars Are Projectors -Modest Mouse
Something Bells -Daedelus
Winter in America -Gil Scott-Heron
Jesu, Joy Of Man’s Desiring -Leo Kottke
New Year’s Eve – Tom Waits

STRANGER PLAYLIST
In the Hall of the Mountain King – Wagner
O Tannenbaum – They Might Be Giants
Saturn, Bringer of Old Age – New York Philharmonic
Historia Der Geburt Jesu Christi: Recitative: Und Er Stund Auf
Riu, Riu, Chiu
O Viergo Virginum
Winter – Vivaldi’s Four Seasons
Sinfonia in G (from ‘Christmas Oratorio’) – Johannes Bach
Sonata: Padouana a 5 – Gabrieli Consort & Players/Paul McCreesh
Sinfonia – Geza Oberfrank & Hungarian Radio Choir & Failoni Chamber Orchestra
Pavane – Pierre Attaingnant
Christe Redemptor a 4 – William Byrd
Die winter ist Verganghen
Crions Noel – Alexander Agricola
A Mery Moode
Robin Hoode – Mr. Ascue
Twenty Waies Upon The Bells – Thomas Robinson
Nowell
Benedicta Es, Coelorum Regina
O vis aeternitatis – Ensemble Für Fruhe Musik Augsburg
Ave Maria – Franz Schubert
Recessional: “In Dulci Jubilo” – Gabrieli Consort & Players/Paul McCreesh
Gloucestershire Wassail – Loreena McKennitt
What Child is This – Vince Guaraldi
I Believe in Father Christmas – Emerson Lake and Palmer
Aud Lan Syne

Our economy won’t grow forever, of course, but we shouldn’t let the maniacs fly us over a cliff of their own making, just because they’re tied to the steering wheel and gas pedal in an insane game of chicken. The bastards will take us all down with them, and the poorest of us will be the first to perish. How’s that for some seasonal tidings?

The Republicans are the worst wagers of this war, and they just don’t care what the nation thinks about them. Their party is in disarray, public opinion of them couldn’t be worse, and they’re still acting like insane, moronic children. They are unfit to govern. While some of them may be beginning to accept reality, they have by and large, “out of touch with the American people,” according to John Weaver, a senior adviser to past presidential candidates John McCain. The polling suggests as much.

And when racists like Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio are accepting awards from neo-confederate groups, and others are trying to leave the union, they don’t exactly paint a picture of rationality and moderation.

So people are taking matters into their own hands. Homeowners are threatening to foreclose on the banks. People are finding marijuana to be a much better substitute than risky prescription drugs for weaning themselves off of other dangerous addictions. Direct action and reasonable measures may win the day after all.

Even if the FBI spies on and oppresses progressive protest movements like Occupy. Even if that selfsame spy state tightens its grip. Even if so-called progressive leaders expand those powers and reach.

I believe the children are the future. Unfortunately, President Obama has had 178 children murdered in Pakistan and Yemen by U.S. drone strikes. He believes they are the past.

So our future is doomed. We don’t have to like it. We don’t have to take it sitting down.

It wasn’t all bad news, just look at a few of the things that progressives accomplished in 2012:

  1. Historic progress to end the war on drugs.
  2. New fuel efficiency standards.
  3. Young undocumented immigrants received deportation relief.
  4. Anti-LGBT Senate candidates lost, in large numbers.
  5. President Obama endorsed marriage equality.
  6. Voters rejected anti-choice candidates.
  7. Voter suppression lost.
  8. The Supreme Court upheld Obamacare.

This wasn’t just a great year for Marijuana users, but a harrowing one for synthetic drug users who found the legal or quasi-legal stimulants like bath salts to be cheap alternatives to criminalized plants.

By 2012, amphetamine-type stimulants, including synthetic bath salt derivatives, had become more popular worldwide than either cocaine or heroin, according to the United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime (UNODC).

Then again, it was a tough year for labor, with some of the most contentious battles and anxiety-inducing headlines of the year:

  1. Hostess Blames Workers for Bankruptcy Caused by Executives
  2. Right-to-Work Laws Passed by Spiteful Conservatives
  3. Wisconsin Recall of Scott Walker Failed
  4. American Airlines Employees Rally to Protest Cuts
  5. NFL Referees Replaced by Pathetic Scabs
  6. Apple-Foxconn Factory Workers in China Committed Mass Suicide
  7. Chicago Teacher’s Union Strike
  8. Koch Brothers Funnel Billions into Right-Wing Causes and Candidates
  9. Obama Barely Mentions Labor in Debates
  10. WalMart Workers Protest
  11. Bangladesh Factory Fire Kills Workers
  12. Fast-food Workers Strike

Matt Taibbi of Rolling Stone announced his pick for ‘Biggest Wall Street Story of the Year’ to the massive Libor scandal.

“If it’s true that the 16 biggest banks in the world were fixing global interest rates, then it’s hard not to argue that that’s not the biggest financial corruption case in history,” Taibbi says in a web exclusive for Current TV. “I fully expect that we’ll find out in the end that American banks were involved in this scandal.”

It was also a big year for Anonymous, with their hacktivism against bad copyright laws, censorship, evil religious zealots and police brutality ending up some of the biggest tech news of 2012.

And WIRED collected their top picks for the biggest tech stories in review:

  1. Government Spybots!
  2. Bradley Manning Gets His Day in Court
  3. SOPA and PIPA
  4. Supreme Court Takes a Stand Against Warrantless GPS Tracking
  5. Megaupload Becomes Mega Headache for U.S. Government
  6. Sabu and the Crackdown on Anonymous
  7. Stuxnet and Flame Viruses
  8. Julian Assange Seeks Asylum
  9. Paula and Petraeus Affair
  10. John McAfee On the Lam!

And some of the most outrageous science fiction stories that became science fact in the news!

  1. A Cyborg Competes Against Able-Bodied Athletes at the Olympics
  2. NASA Starts to Work on a Faster-Than-Light Warp Drive
  3. Scientists Enhance the Intelligence of Primates with a Chip
  4. The Earth Experiences its First True Superstorm
  5. The World’s First Cybernetic Hate Crime Occurs at a McDonalds in France
  6. Augmented Reality Goes Mainstream
  7. Researchers Create a Robot With Legs That Can Run Faster Than any Human
  8. The First Successful Commercial Cargo Delivery to Space Goes Off Without a Hitch
  9. An Electric Car is the Year’s Best
  10. Doctors Communicate With a Man in a Coma
  11. The First Large-Scale Geoengineering Project is Detected Off Canada’s West Coast
  12. A Child Attends School By Sending a Robot in His Place
  13. A Paralyzed Woman Controls a Robotic Arm Using Only Her Mind
  14. Self-Driving Cars Become Legal in Three States
  15. Scientists Create an Artificial Retina
  16. Researchers Create the First Complete Computer Model of a Living Organism

And looking forward, here are the civil liberties cases the Supreme Court may tackle in 2013:

  1. Same-Sex Marriage
  2. Federal Voting Rights Authority
  3. Race in University Admissions
  4. Can Corporations Be Sued For Overseas Human Rights Abuses?
  5. Can For-Profit Corporations Patent Human Genes?
  6. Warrantless Drug Searches By Police
  7. Death Penalty Convicts’ Right To Attorneys
  8. Do Right-To-Know Laws Stop At State Lines?

Non-belief in religion grew to the third largest affiliation in the world, The Washington Post writes:

A new report on global religious identity shows that while Christians and Muslims make up the two largest groups, those with no religious affiliation — including atheists and agnostics — are now the third-largest “religious” group in the world.

The study, released Tuesday by the Pew Forum on Religion & Public Life, found that Christians make up the largest group, with 2.2 billion adherents, or 32 percent worldwide, followed by Muslims, with 1.6 billion adherents, or 23 percent. Close behind are the “nones” — those who say they have no religious affiliation or do not believe in God — at 1.1 billion, or 16 percent.

This translates to big problems for United States politicians, where around 20% of the electorate are atheist/agnostic. So if you’re religious, don’t bash or exclude those who aren’t. Stand up for separation of church and state. Stand up for marriage equality and reproductive choice. Stand up for science.

Reject the false prophets like Old Paths Baptist Church Pastor Sam Morris, Franklin Graham, Bryan Fischer of the American family Association, James Dobson who proselytize that atheism is to blame for atrocities like school shootings.

This and much worse discrimination against non-believers is prevalent around the world.

This anti-atheist discrimination is severe. It takes the form of being arrested. It takes the form of being imprisoned for years. It takes the form of being targeted by a mob screaming for your blood… and when the police who should be there to protect you show up, instead they throw you in jail in Egypt, Indonesia, Greece, India, Turkey, Tunisia…

It even takes the form of a powerful Christian majority blasting the atheist minority for waging a non-existent ‘War on Christmas.’ A ridiculous prospect anyway, since many of the holiday traditions we love have Pagan roots.

  1. Celebrating the Winter Solstice with Festivals.
  2. Candles & Lights
  3. Trees
  4. Yule Wreaths 
  5. Santa
  6. Mistletoe
  7. Holly 
  8. Feasting! 
  9. Gift Giving
  10. Hearth Fires and Yule Logs

And who is waging the real war on Christmas, when Santa is arrested for chalking good tidings on public sidewalks? He is a dirty liberal, after all. Ignoring supply-side economics to hand out ‘free stuff.’

A new Public Policy Polling survey found that 44 percent of respondents think Santa is a Democrat, while 28 percent believe he’s a Republican.”*

And to all, a good night!

Stranger in a Strange Land 2012-12-29: Santacular! by The Stranger on Mixcloud

~The Stranger
thestranger@earthling.net

The Naughty List

Stock PhotoSince Christmas is coming, and The Stranger has plans to talk to Santa this month, it only seems fitting to compile a list of those who have been very naughty on a societal level, to save old Saint Nick the burdensome time involved. After all, he’ll need that extra time to shovel massive amounts of coal (which Mitt Romney would actually love). Beyond these ne’er-do-wells, we’ll take a look at some of the toys and gadgets that humanity are using both as tools for good and instruments of evil.

Stranger in a Strange Land 2012-12-08: The Naughty List by The Stranger on Mixcloud

PLAYLIST
In the Hall of the Mountain King – Funk United
Why Don’t You Take Us – Sky King
Peace And Love (Movement I-V) – Mandrill
Garden Of Paradise – Steve Hillage
Dream Weaver – Gary Wright
Dreams/Comrades – Stark Reality
Smokey Joe The Dreamer – Bullet
Dream Sequence – Amon Tobin
In-flux – DJ Shadow
When Happening – Bleubird
Bill Murray – Gorillaz
Devoted Bone Dance – Faust
The Grid – Philip Glass
Silver – Bonobo
In The Music (w/Malik B.) – The Roots
Il Ponte Di Corde – Ennio Morricone
Bang Bang (My Baby Shot Me Down) – Nancy Sinatra

Another Pew Survey finds that most Americans would lay the blame on Republicans if no “fiscal cliff” deal is reached by the end of the year.

The poll finds that 53 percent say Republicans in Congress would be blamed, while 27 percent say President Obama would be to blame, down from 29 percent last time.

Of course, the fake fiscal cliff ignores other, very real cliffs in this country: The child poverty cliff. Education. The Baby-boomer healthcare cliff. The environment.

And that naughty GOP stands obstinate against raising taxes on the wealthy, but is planning to raise taxes on the wretched middle classes, cutting the spending that helps them and throwing them over the cliff. They are a group of despicable tax extremists, with a full quarter of registered Republicans in the country say they want to secede from the United States , Public Policy Polling (PPP) reports. The polling company posted a Twitter message yesterday that read: “25% of Republicans want their state to secede on account of Obama’s reelection.”

49% of GOP voters nationally say they think that ACORN stole the election for President Obama. We found that 52% of Republicans thought that ACORN stole the 2008 election for Obama, so this is a modest decline, but perhaps smaller than might have been expected given that ACORN doesn’t exist anymore.

This week they turned against their own Bob Dole to challenge a Civil Rights bill, and fought against the UN’s disability rights rules (which had no enforcement, anyway) based on their outmoded and baseless conspiracy theories:

  • UN Disability Treaty ‘Undermines American Sovereignty’
  • Agenda 21
  • UN Arms Trade Treaty
  • Reparations for Climate Change

Our only hope now is that the GOP will purge the most awful in their party, in hopes that Santa Claus will spare them.

The courts aren’t much better, granting more power to corporations over actual individual humans, far beyond the U.S. Supreme Court 2010 Citizens United ruling.

  1. Secret Courts For Consumer Products
  2. Corporate Religious Freedom
  3. Employment-Employee Arbitration Denied a Day In Court
  4. Patent Rulings Also Extending Corporate Clout

So these giant financial fictions have been using every tool at their disposal to hollow out America and put us on the verge of DEBTPOCALYPSE! Can we really blame our judges and politicians for merely being tools?

40 years of austerity politics have hollowed out the heartland, as financial wizards of Wall Street gobbled up ever more of the nation’s resources.

The financial services industry alone takes as much as $635 billion from the real economy annually, a ‘creative extraction‘ for financial services they call “capital intermediation pipeline”. But the advancement of technology and quantitative analysis should have made the process less expensive. But they have not. Capital intermediation is now more costly than it was in the days of JP Morgan (adjusted for inflation).

New research points out that capital intermediation costs have been rising since 1980, coincident with the beginning of three and a half decades of deregulation. The average financial sector share of the GDP over the 20 years prior to 1980 (4.2 percent), the current financial sector share of GDP, 8.3 percent, means that the amount of GDP represented by the financial sector is $635 billion higher each year than it would be based on its GDP share before the Great Deregulation Experiment began.

Capital intermediation is the process through which the economy determines which productive activities, if any, will be implemented. It is how the supply of jobs for the American public is replenished and preserved. A broad and diverse supply of new jobs better assures that income and wealth will be fairly and evenly distributed. The public bears the cost of the value extracted by the financial sector by exploiting distortions in this critically important process, distortions that it often creates to generate higher profits.

In short, it’s as if there were a tax on the non-financial portions of the economy that redistributes wealth to the financial sector.

Financial markets work efficiently when prices are transparent and fairly reflect fundamental value. Consumers cannot know which ones to trust, and which ones to bust. Corporations have been on a record-shattering crime spree;

  • Wells Fargo paid a $175 million settlement after the feds caught its brokers systematically pushing minority customers into mortgages with higher rates and fees, even though they posed the same credit risks as whites. One study found that Wells Fargo charged Hispanics $2,000 more in what the Justice Department called a “racial surtax.” The bank docked blacks nearly $3,000 extra

And while this massive civil rights fraud was perpetrated against 30,000 customers, the settlement amounted to just .011 percent of the San Francisco bank’s annual income.

  • U.S. Bank also swindled its customers. Instead of logging debit card purchases in the order they were made, the bank rearranged them from highest amount to lowest, the better to artificially stick customers with overdraft fees. U.S. Bank paid $55 million to settle a class action suit in July. It was the 13th major bank caught running this scam.
  • American Express. It promised $300 to anyone who signed up for its Blue Sky card, then decided it would be way better to just stiff them. The company was also caught charging illegal late fees and discriminating against older applicants.
  • Bank of America was caught illegally foreclosing on the homes of active-duty soldiers. Visa and MasterCard were charged with fixing the prices they charged merchants to process credit card payments. Morgan Stanley colluded to drive up New York electricity prices. And in the most depraved case of all, Morgan Stanley was even sued for allegedly swindling Irish nuns in an investment deal.

Yet not a single boss went to jail.

This is the new Mafioso, with Senators and judges in their pockets. Most never see a day in court, or settle for just a fraction of what they’ve stolen. Many deny any wrongdoing and still see their wealth and stock prices rise. They also unleash far more damage on the world stage than any Mafia don.

They’re hitting the media echo chamber they own and love, both Republicans and Democrats, to advocate the shredding of the social safety net that Americans need and love. They want to bleed every last drop from us.

The group includes Goldman Sachs’ Lloyd Blankfein, JPMorgan Chase’s Jamie Dimon, Honeywell’s David Cote, Aetna’s Mark Bertolini, Delta Airlines’ Richard Anderson, Boeing’s W. James McNerney, and over 100 other influential business honchos and their supporters.

These CEOs talk about shared sacrifice, but it seems that they don’t intend to share anything but your retirement money with their wealthy friends.

Many more obscenely rich whiners and ‘takers‘ are deserving of a kinky visit from the Krampus:

  • Lloyd Blankfein, chairman and CEO, Goldman, Sachs & Co.
  • Jeffrey Immelt, chairman and CEO, General Electric Company
  • Jamie Dimon, chairman and CEO, JPMorgan Chase & Co
  • Carly Fiorina, David Cote The CEO of Honeywell International, David Siegel (Westgate resorts), John Metz…

Others destroy jobs rather than give back, dishonestly claiming that they can ‘fix the debt’ by slashing their own taxes:

  • Randall Stephenson, AT&T
    Average effective federal corporate income tax rate, 2009-2011: 6.3%
    U.S. job layoffs since 2007: 54,000
  • Lowell McAdam, Verizon
    Average effective federal corporate income tax rate, 2009-2011: -3.3%
    U.S. job layoffs since 2007: 30,000
  • David Cote, Honeywell
    Average effective federal corporate income tax rate, 2009-2011: -14.8%
    U.S. job layoffs since 2007: 4,000
  • Kenneth Frazier, Merck
    Average effective federal corporate income tax rate, 2009-2011: 13.2%
    U.S. job layoffs since 2007: 13,000
  • Terry Lundgren, Macy’s
    Average effective federal corporate income tax rate, 2009-2011: 20.7%
    U.S. job layoffs since 2007: 7,000

And let’s not forget the Koch Brothers and their insidiously well-funded ALEC, and the many shills of phony “public servants” they’ve paid for:

Michigan Gov. Rick Snyder announced that he would sign so-called “right to work” legislation designed to gut union membership in the auto capital of the world. He’s funded by the Koch brothers, and the legislation is typically, from ALEC.

The Capitol bldg in Michigan was chaotic as police peppersprayed protesters and locked down the building, forcing Democrats to seek a court order to get the doors open again. “It’s not only anti-worker, its anti-democratic,”

Right to work bills prohibit unions from requiring all members to pay dues. The laws make it much harder for unions to organize and exist. They have long been used in the South to push down wages and weaken worker movements. The Michigan bill will apply to both public and private sector unions.

At a time when working families are struggling, the Michigan GOP decided it was a fine time to push for a race to the bottom in wages and working conditions, while at the same time kneecapping their chief opponents in the political arena — organized workers.

But there has to be some ways to stop the bleeding caused by psychopathic plutocrats and their corporate fraud, rogue traders, rate fixing, and money laundering.

The Rich Don’t Always Win explores a host of these proposals.

Leverage the power of the public purse against excessive corporate executive pay. Congress couldn’t directly set limits on private corporate executive pay, yesterday’s progressives understood. But Congress could impose limits indirectly by denying federal government contracts and subsidies to corporations that lavished rewards on top executives.

In 1933, then-senator and later Supreme Court justice Hugo Black won congressional approval for legislation that denied federal air- and ocean-mail contracts to companies that paid their execs over $17,500, about $300,000 in today’s dollars.

But the New Deal never fully embraced the Hugo Black perspective. We could now, by denying federal contracts and tax breaks to any companies that pay their CEOs over 25 times what their workers are making.

Give Americans a safe alternative to private banks. For Louis Brandeis, a reform giant who also became a Supreme Court justice, prohibiting financial institutions from speculating with the savings of average Americans always remained a top priority.

In the early 1930s, Brandeis advocated the expansion of postal savings banks, a system — in effect since 1911 — that paid 2 percent interest on modest savings accounts maintained with the post office. That expansion never took place, and postal savings banks withered away.

Tax undistributed corporate profits. America’s biggest corporations are currently sitting on stashes of cash that have hit mega-billion levels.

Cap income at America’s economic summit. In 1942, in the midst of a war-time fiscal squeeze, President Franklin Roosevelt proposed a 100 percent tax on all individual income over $25,000, the equivalent of about $355,000 today.

Congress didn’t go along. But lawmakers did set the top tax rate at 94 percent on income over $200,000, and federal income tax top rates hovered around 90 percent for most of the next two decades, years of unprecedented prosperity.

We could, for instance, set the entry threshold for a new 90 percent top rate as a multiple of our nation’s minimum wage. The higher the minimum wage, the higher the threshold, the softer the total tax bite out of the nation’s highest incomes.

Our nation’s wealthiest and most powerful, under this approach, would suddenly have a vested interest in enhancing the well-being of our poorest and weakest.

Even former NY Gov Eliot Spitzer is advocating a tax on the trades made by the financial industries: A tax of less than half a percent on every $100 of stock sales or sales of other financial instruments including bonds, derivatives, and options. The tax could raise anywhere from $170 billion to $350 billion per year depending how it was applied.

The real way to Fix the Debt: End Corporate Entitlements and Demand Big Business Pays Its Fair Share.

The plutocrats are indeed a little worried in their towers; after spending millions to defeat Elizabeth Warren, she was elected anyway and will serve on the Senate’s Banking Committee, where she will have “influence over regulators and the industry that non-panel members don’t enjoy.”

She has built her career on being a progressive who fights against banks and big money. Warren was attacked during the election by the likes of the US Chamber of Commerce, who called her a “threat to free enterprise.” I, for one, would welcome that hatred.

In other good news, the Defense Department has begun planning for the roughly $500 billion in major cuts to their spending. Just the thing the doctor ordered for the debt and deficit, considering that our militarization accounts for the majority of our budget.

Of course, extrajudicial imprisonment and indefinite detention for Americans are still very much in the power of said military, what with the doubling down of the NDAA by traitors like Dianne Feinstein.

And Bradley Manning, who testified that he thought he would die in custody, serves as a canary to the sort of brutal treatment we all could face for standing up for our rights, our conscience, or against war crimes.

“Brad’s treatment at Quantico will forever be etched in our nation’s history as a disgraceful moment in time… Not only was it stupid and counterproductive – it was criminal,” ~Manning’s defense attorney David Combs said in his first-ever public appearance regarding US v. Manning.

Even the drone program, lauded by Democrats and Republicans alike for its efficiency at killing brown people, may have been copied by Iranian military, who are claiming to have shot down another.

Newly released records of drone licenses reveal extensive domestic surveillance within the continental United States.

These records, received as a result of EFF’s Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) lawsuit against the Federal Aviation Administration (FAA), come from state and local law enforcement agencies, universities and—for the first time—three branches of the U.S. military: the Air Force, Marine Corps, and DARPA (Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency).

Air Force’s drone operators sometimes practice surveillance missions by tracking civilian cars along the highways.

Local police, military, even the corporations fused together to target American civilians.

Your email, saved messages, phone records, location data, IP addresses, text messages, cloud data, social media information, all of it has become available to law enforcement without a warrantThere are countless ways that the police can spy on you now without a warrantand the cops can pull some pretty outrageous stunts and get away with them:

  • The NYPD’s Demographics Unit has engaged in a massive surveillance program of Warrantless home surveillance, Infiltration, informants and monitoring similar to the COINTELPRO against activists in the 1960s.
  • Preemptive visits and harassment. One of the favorite tactics of police departments is targeting activists a day before a large event, even extrajudicial preemptive arrests.
  • Creating call logs from stolen phones. If you lose your phone in NYC and report it to the police, they’ll help you find it. So far, so good. Where the agreement turns pear-shaped, however, is what they do with your call logs. The NYPD subpoenas your call log from the day it was stolen onward, under the logic that the records could help find your phone, adding your information to a database called the Enterprise Case Management System, and the numbers are hyperlinked for cross-referencing. The call logs, all obtained without a court order and often without the victim’s permission or knowledge, could “conceivably be used for any investigative purpose,”
  • Stop and frisk.
  • Operation Pipeline.
  • Police dogs with the “Clever Hans effect” 
  • Surveillance drones.
  • For-profit Prisons.
  • School-to-prison pipelines. 
  • Scary capabilities to track you wherever you’re driving.

But, as with any technology, it can be used for good as well as evil. Mother Jones lists a few ways that drones, for instance, may be co-opted by the forces of productivity, science, and justice:

  • Farming: The Japanese have used robo-crop-dusters for decades, monitor the growth of crops, And with the shortage of skilled ag pilots, drones could very well swoop in.
  • Chasing storms
  • Catching poachers: The WWF just won a $5 million Google grant to implement a drone-based poacher surveillance system in Asia and Africa.
  • Watching the environment: The scientists who came up with the WWF drones have already used them to monitor orangutans and deforestation in Indonesia. The US Geological Survey also has a whole office devoted to drone projects.
  • Going into the danger zone: In the first weeks after the Fukushima nuclear disaster
  • Protecting human rights: On the flip side, some activists have suggested drones can be used to monitor human rights violations. The cofounders of the Genocide Intervention Network have argued that drones should be used by human rights organizations to document violence in Syria, where the government has tried to silence journalists with targeted killings.
  • Journalism: *Ulp* Is this another form of automation that may put me out of a job?

If you’re likewise afraid of being replaced, consider the future of replacing your own parts with cybernetics. The world’s largest brain simulation is underway, with 2.5 million simulated neurons:

With 2.5 million simulated neurons, a team of researchers at the University of Waterloo have claimed the world’s largest functioning model of the brain. Called Spaun (short for Semantic Pointer Architecture Unified Network), the model “captures biological details of each neuron, including which neurotransmitters are used, how voltages are generated in the cell, and how they communicate. Spaun uses this network of neurons to process visual images to control an arm that draws Spaun’s answers to perceptual, cognitive and motor tasks.”

Stranger in a Strange Land 2012-12-08: The Naughty List by The Stranger on Mixcloud

~The Stranger
thestranger@earthling.net

Foods I Hate

People tend to impose their tastes on others, outrageously insulted that you would dare dislike something they find so delicious or popular. They simply can’t understand why you won’t change your mind, taste buds, or every fiber of your being to enjoy what they enjoy. This is especially visceral when it comes to foodstuffs, as every foodie populist or connoisseur elitist has a seemingly intractable opinions of how flavinoids should affect everybody. Their indignance, I fear at times, borders on the psychopathic; such that someday some fascist may round up all the non-Brussel-sprout-eaters and march them into the death camps once and for all.

A little hyperbolic, sure, but I prefer to arrive at my own irrational choices, thank you. Harmless and meaningless, they are not dictated by any ideological preference (such as vegans or locavores) nor any allergy (such as gluten-free or nuts). Speaking of nuts, one reason people may not take kindly to your opinions may be because they feel it attacks or denigrates the validity of their own, or rejects them personally. Weak.

So over time, my tastes have refined and/or expanded; where I once refused vegetables, I now enjoy the occasional salad, where I once despised the taste of beer I have since acclimated to it, and where I once went for the spiciest of wings on the menu, I now prefer to actually taste my food.

Here are my top five most despised flavors, in descending order.

Onions

onions

Onions definitely hold a special place of hatred in my heart.. or whatever organ determines hate.. probably the gall bladder.

I’ve never been partial to them, despite the insistence of others, and their existence in just about every Goddamned recipe. I don’t know if it’s their simultaneously slimy-and-crunchy consistency, their pungency, or their eye-wateringly badness, I just can’t do it. Sure, if someone cooks me something, I won’t be so ungracious as to refuse them, but neither will I hesitate to wait the extra twenty minutes to get my Crave Case without onions.

My total stubbornness may have descended from my days working at the Sandwich Shoppe, as a rookie Sandwichsmithee (long before holding the title of Patron Saint of Sandwichmaking) I was relegated the stenchy task of peeling and slicing 1-2 buckets of these nasty, noxious nuggets.

Strangely, the onion’s erstwhile cousin, garlic, has got to be in my top five foods, if not number one of all time. All time! Go figure.

Licorice

Liquorice_wheels

I find black licorice disagreeable in particular (racist). Its status as candy is dubious, and its relationship to red licorice is unfortunate. I’m not a big fan of either, but while I could stomach the red vines, I shudder at the thought of that slick, twisted ebony foulness reaching my mouth. This hereditary abhorrence comes down from my grandmother, but I know from talking to people that licorice of any kind is not a commonly well-liked food. Most people avoid anything but the red stuff, and even then do not hurry to its defense. Still, you will meet the occasional weirdo who proselytizes a fervent dedication to black licorice. Shun them.

COFFEE

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So many people on the planet adore coffee, sometimes I feel like “Rowdy” Roddy Piper in They Live! My father used to make and drink an entire pot of coffee while performing his morning routine, then make another to take with him in a thermos on the way to work, only to drink Lord knows how much while at work. I’ve been made to understand that this is not exactly abnormal for coffeeholics. I find no small irony in the idea of waking up at four in the morning to put a pot of wretched black coffee on in order to get the caffeine necessary to begin the day. And apparently, I’m the crazy one.

I find coffee to be unremittingly bitter, massively gaseous, and vile bile. It’s dark aroma of complex nuttiness and vaporous undertones of earthiness can only be described in a single word for me: ‘bletch!’

The residue it leaves in my mouth whenever I have given in to peer insistence and tried a new variety (‘you just haven’t tried the right kind, yet!) is parallelled only by my equal and appropriate hatred of the word ‘residue.’

Don’t mistake me, I do enjoy caffeine. Whatever life expectancy and health benefits I would have derived from denying myself coffee have been reasonably obliterated by my love of soda.

Mint

mint_leaf.151140938_std

While the breath fresheners, tooth whiteners, and pillow adorners of the world have pushed this idea of ‘minty freshness’ on us, I recoil in frustration. I try to find alternatives; fruity gum, orange toothpaste, cinnamon mouthwash, or even just a shiny new apple a day. But the ubiquitous nature of nature’s fresh-maker makes me feel… not so fresh.

I’ve been told, as with many of the items on this list, that it is an acquired taste. But why bother acquiring a taste you find so distasteful?

I don’t relish the biting sting or mouthy leafiness of mint, and I can’t believe that some poor, misguided fools would pair it with chocolate, ice cream or Jell-O. Ridiculous. Idiotic. Fucking pathetic.

Kill it with fire.

ALMONDS

almonds1

Nuts are one of those types of foods people can never seem to agree on. Some people hate the hazelnuts and love walnuts, while others swear by the health properties of brazil nuts and eschew chestnuts. Diversity in opinion abounds regarding pine nuts, pecans and pistachios, whereas the fatty macadamia is often heaped with adulation. We all seem to agree on cashews and peanuts, which are not really nuts but legumes. Allergies notwithstanding.

Almonds are the devil.

Not only is it a shameful slap in the face of one of history’s greatest American heroes, George Washington Carver, but also one of mankind’s oldest foes. Almonds were originally toxic to our mortal form, synthesizing as cyanide in our frail bodies. Only through random genetic mutation and careful horticultural selection were the dangerous and evil pods tamed to their present form. Seething  in their dry bitterness, the wrinkled old malefactors silently await their revenge, encroaching and infesting every innocent salad and unwitting bridge mix.

It is only a matter of time before they learn to kill again.

DISHonorable Mention: Circus Peanuts

marshpeanuts-lge_thumb[3]

Circus peanuts, (more commonly known as ‘WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT??’) are not an official list item of my Most Hated Foods, based solely on the technicality that they are not actually food. Owed the singular distinction of being the only consumable more disliked by humanity than ‘Candy Corn’, it shares with it the same inexplicably inaccurate naming. Despite being vaguely molded to look like a moldy old peanut, they are the same pale orange as some medical scrubs, PAAS eggs, or weird cardboard, all of which adequately give you an idea as to their flavor as well.

You can chew it, but it doesn’t ever get chewed.

Somehow, this material was marketed to children by perverted sadists as something they should put in their bodies. Luckily, no child will willingly eat them, and only 90-year-old great-grandmothers find them palatable, out of some misplaced sense of nostalgia. Back during the Depression Era, you see, you either ate cardboard or you starved.

More astoundingly, if you cut them into tiny shapes and then douse them in milk with cereal, they become tolerable, downright edible if artificially flavored somehow.

*******************

Of course, we all have our preferences to varying degrees. There are certainly dishes and flavor combos that I find undesirable or even repellant as well, and I must confess that I’ve not much a sweet tooth. I don’t indulge in chocolate for chocolate’s sake, but rather as a trace or hint combined with some other culinary creation. All in all, you’d find me a fairly easy person to order pizza with, amenable as I am to everything from pepperoni and sausage to pineapple and anchovies. I’ve a weakness for savory snacks and filling proteins, rich smoothies and light pastries. I’m as open-minded as they come, and in all honesty will not insult my host should they unknowingly happen an inclusion of those foods I hate.

But oh, how I fucking hate them.

Gifts of Lovecraft

If you’re anything as lucky as me, then you’ve found a significant other/trans-dimensional monster hunter/mental patient to share your life with, however short that may be. And if your beloved and accursed life partner is an enthusiast, nay, a votary, of all things weird and macabre, then you might need a little help finding the inspired gifts to show them the horrific holiday, blighted birthday or abhorrent anniversary you both deserve! These Lovecraftian artifacts will spell out your love beyond the ageless æons and non-Euclidean space, as the dread Cthulhu has already permeated our modern popular culture with its putrid tentacles… of doom.

BOOKS & ART

Whether a long-time devotee or curious neophyte, anyone interested in ‘the Mythos‘ could find no better place to delve than these gorgeous collections, The Eldritch Tales and the Necronomicon. The faux-leather covers and gold-embossed Les Edwards illustrations (not to mention the inside Virgil Finlay sketch of Howard Phillips Lovecraft) make these commemorative editions a must-have. Notably,  Robert E. Howard‘s Conan the Barbarian is also collected in a similar series, as the two share a contextual history. Then again, a lot of fictional universes dip into the Cthulhu Mythos, from some of Stephen King‘s short stories to Robert Anton Wilson and Robert Shea‘s Illuminatus! Trilogy, and even more recently, episodes of South Park.

Originally written for the pulp magazines of the 1920s and 1930s, H. P. Lovecraft’s astonishing tales blend elements of horror, science fiction, and cosmic terror that are as powerful today as they were when they were first published.

One might also gaze upon the maelstrom of aesthetes and devotees of the black arts, who have lent their skills to paintings, illustrations, sketches and essays of these mighty Elder Gods. The Lovecraft Retrospective is chock full of artists inspired by the Master of Horror Fiction, including H. R. Giger and Mike Mignola, among at least forty others (with an introduction by Harlan Ellison). Although Giger released his own Necronomicon work with an introduction by Clive Barker, and Mike Mignola, (in addition to doing a brilliant cover for a collection) also paid tribute to the man himself in the Codex Arcana. Not to mention the very looming presence of Ancient Ones in the Hellboy universe.

Or peruse the works of the late Jean Giraud, whether they be in full comic book form, or covers such as Lovecraft: Letters D’Arkham, Marginalia, 1975.

Speaking of art, it’s a damned shame (and I do mean damned) that, for copyright reasons, these hilarious crossovers, mash-ups or remixes are not available for purchase. Such as Murray Groat (A.K.A. Muzski)’s versions of Tintin within the Mythos, as Hergé/Moulinsart S.A.’s rights apply:

“I am getting alot of print requests by email, which is nice, but I have to sadly tell each and everyone of them that I cannot.”

cc5203223fe766c426332abee9c40d02.jpg

Or the multi-chaptered project to chronicle Bil Keane‘s The Family Circus as they fall into the inky æther of ‘unspeakable horrors.’

Or Dr. Faustus‘ Seussian retellings:

This is not to say, of course, that one cannot make a fine print of these deviations for personal, non-commercial use.

DRINK

One method of inducing a thrilling madness is to first enter a drunken stupor. Though many soporific aperitifs of the Eldritch abomination exist, only a few are readily extant and/or non-fictitious.

Demon’s Hop Yard IPA is brewed by Anheuser-Busch, Inc., and can be found in several states (Lovecraft’s ‘Devil’s Hopyard’ was in his fictional town of Dunwich).

Clear, bright golden, with copper hues topped with a thick, clinging hop-induced lace that trails the beer as it’s consumed. Aroma is dank, resiny and saturated with a pronounced herbal character.

Miskatonic Dark Rye is a vegan and organic ale from (where else?) Portland, Oregon brewing company Captured by Porches. I’m sure it’s what the students at Miskatonic U get soused on as they pore over dusty tomes in ancient libraries.

Smooth. Rye spiced with chocolate and wine tones. Light to medium bodied. Made with organic two row and malted wheat, rye, and oats. Malted with crystal and chocolate. Hopped with domestic tettnanger.

Others are more secret, nigh-mythical brews, such as the Limited Edition New Year’s Black IPA by Us Vs Them, inspired by the dark lord Cthulhu himself, which is either no longer available or lying asleep for centuries.

Premium 2 row barley, coloring and caramel flavor from 2 speciality malts…the blackness comes from a special de-husked roasted malt called Carafa Special 3… it does not impart that very roasty, astringent or bitter coffee flavor you’d find in a stout, however it does leave a deep, dark tone to the appearance. It was bittered with Chinook and flavored with Amarillo Centenial and Simcoe and fermented with a California Ale Yeast to accentuate the clean bitterness and hop flavors.

Cthulhu Custom Etched Shot Glass

Of course, one needs the proper receptacle to contain the evil spirits with designs on your mind and soul. Might I recommend either the tentacled pint glass, or the Cthulhu custom-etched shot glass, (and filled appropriately with Kraken rum)

A fine gift could be made of Jonathan Chaffin’s Horror in Clay tiki mug, and now that his Kickstarter goal has been made, perhaps in futures told they shall be hewn from matter most foul, but do not seem for sale to the public just yet.

And apparently, HPL was a fervent coffeeholic, with these subversive subcultures crossing in several ways, including the now extinct Cthulhu Coffee.

“Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgahnagl fhtag”  ~ Me, after tasting the foul bitters aforementioned

TOYS

All manner of adorable plushies of the Dread Lord can be found, but some creative artisans have crafted their own worldly totems, as prescribed by the visions in their feverish dreams.

John Kovalic’s My Little Cthulhu:

The various knitted Cthulhu patterns:

Or the abominable HP Lovercraft figure by Alex CF:

My first DIY action figure project is a hand molded, cast and painted effigy of Lovecraft, along with a copy of the fabled and despised Necronomicon! Each figure will come as part of a larger box set – including a copy of a comic I have written and drawn, a screen printed t shirt, a screen printed poster, badge and sketch, all in a wax sealed box! These will be available very soon! email merrylinhouse@gmail.com for inquiries!

ENTERTAINMENT

Though many directors have been influenced by HPL’s works, not many have successfully conjured a faithful translation of those strange stories (see: Re-Animator). In 2005, however, director Andrew Leman brought one of the finest independent horror films into our world and onto the silent screen:

The H.P. Lovecraft Historical Society presents its all new silent film of The Call of Cthulhu. The famed story is brought richly to life in the style of a classic 1920s silent movie, with a haunting original symphonic score. Using the “Mythoscope” process — a mix of modern and vintage techniques, the HPLHS has worked to create the most authentic and faithful screen adaptation of a Lovecraft story yet attempted.


More importantly, for the purposes of gift-giving and love-making, a classic black & white flick is the perfect thing to curl up with your loved one on the couch, as a slowly creeping dread encompasses the both of you. (The prolific H.P. Lovecraft Historical Society also villainously vends the album A Shoggoth on the Roof, a CD of Lovecraftian carolsArkham Asylum Certificates of Insanity, and other cult relics.)

The Evil Dead 2 (Book Of The Dead 2 Limited Edition)But if you really want a really great date night, allow the self-parodying  Sam Raimi and manly-chinned Bruce Campbell to open a deathly portal of Dead-ites, with your very own Necronomicon bound in a horrid human face! This Limited Edition ‘Book of the Dead’ isn’t necessarily easy to find, but is full of artwork and special features, and will scream when pressed if in mint condition!

H. P. Lovecraft IH. P. Lovecraft II

H.P. Lovecraft, not so coincidentally, was also a psychedelic acid rock band in the late 1960’s. They only released two albums in 1967 and 1968 before breaking up, renaming and reforming, but their best work were these early nuggets. They’re not exactly horrific or amorous, but their imagery is evocative and dreamlike nonetheless.

TRAVEL

If you desire to steal your beloved away for the week-end, perhaps a themed holiday is in order. If out West, wander to The Lovecraft Bar in Portland, covered in demonic symbols and cosmic tentacles, and visit the annual H.P. Lovecraft Film Festival and Cthulhu Con. Or make your way to L.A. for their version of the Eldritch Events. Florida each year holds the NecronomiCon, a science fiction, fantasy and horror convention now in its 31st year.

But for real historical ambiance, what could be more romantic than a getaway to New England, to the hexed locality that spawned so many legends of spirits and devils and witchcraft, and a never-ending litany of literary progeny, from Hawthorne and Poe to Lovecraft and King. Begin in Lovecraft’s hometown of Providence, Rhode Island (though the Angell St. family mansion was torn down in 1961). Take the walking tour of College Hill, his old stomping grounds. From there, expedition to Essex County, Massachusetts (Lovecraft commented often in his letters that Marblehead was one of his favorite towns, saying that he’d live there if he didn’t already live in Providence). The basis for many of the ports and towns in what came to be called Miskatonic County (with an eponymous river and University), or ‘Lovecraft Country,’ containing Dunwich, Innsmouth, Arkham, Kingsport and Billington’s Wood.File:Lovecraft Country.svg

Interestingly, the fictional county is close to Salem, already known for its occult history, and North of the Bridgewater Triangle, a modern hotbed of supposed paranormal activity.

MISCELLANY

If your fated partner cares not for those sweet nothings and sweeping gestures, perhaps the wretched aromatics of the Elder Gods will help spice things up, and the Picnic in Arkham: The Lovecraft Collection of perfumes by Black Phoenix Alchemy Labs:

Azathoth is the blind, idiot god who sits on a black throne at the center of Chaos. His scent is high-pitched and screeching, both impenetrably dark and searingly bright with the clarity of madness: tangerine, saffron, vetiver, black amber and cedarwood.

Shub-Niggurath! The Black Goat of the Woods with a Thousand Young, the All-Mother and wife of the Not-to-Be-Named-One. The lust incense of a corrupted Astarte. A blend of ritual herbs and dark resins, shot through with three gingers and aphrodisiacal spices.

The internet is resplendent with other mementos that profess your dark feelings, so be creative and think outside the box!

Diplomas:

Miskatonic Diploma (Herbert West) Poster

Purses:

And Elder thongs:

Fusion

Tonight a fusion of world events, geopolitics and international genres!

PLAYLIST
In The Hall Of The Mountain King – The Marimba Belles
So What – Miles Davis (Miles From India Tribute)
The Shadow World – Sun Ra
A Minha Menina -Os Mutantes
Zana – Toquinho
Call Any Vegetable Suite -Frank Zappa & The Mothers
This Is An Artistic Statement (Part I) – The Beat Of The Earth
Love Is Like A Bottle Of Gin – The Magnetic Fields
Chilly Winds Don’t Blow – Nina Simone
Everything – Radio Citizen feat. Bajka
Sax Quartet – Seatbelts
Star Vader – Guitar Vader
Jardin Chinois – Cirque Du Soleil
La Petite Fille de la Mer – Vangelis
Storm – Parov Stelar
In-Flux – DJ Shadow
The Lighthouse – Amon Tobin
Scratch Bass – Lamb
Track 24 – Z-Trip
A Sunday Mystery – RjD2
Midnight Lullaby – Tom Waits
Niltrous Burn Out 2012 – Man… Or Astroman?

Many Republicans who voted for contempt against Eric Holder in his ‘Fast and the Furious’ operation, subscribe to a conspiracy theory holding that the administration tried to boost the number of weapons going to Mexico in order to increase support for gun regulations that have never been introduced.

This does not make sense.

Aside from the fact that Mr. Holder had no direct influence over the operation (something that he could, theoretically, actually be criticized for by sane individuals), President Obama hasn’t so much as breathed a word of gun control speak in the general direction of the ten-foot pole not even touching the issue. But then again, these are the same reactionary citizens who have no problem bordering on treasonous remarks when it benefits their fancy little Tea Party.

“To resist by all means that are right in the eyes of God is not rebellion or insurrection, it is patriotic resistance to invasion.”

-Roy Nicholson, Chairman of the Mississippi Tea Party

In light of the open suggestions of armed revolt, Glenn Greenwald at Salon wonders:

Does President Obama have the power to order Nicholson assassinated without charges or trial? Should he have this right? What’s the principled distinction that makes assassinating Awlaki acceptable but not Nicholson? The most likely answer is that Awlaki was in Yemen while Nicholson is in the U.S., but that’s just a pragmatic difference, one that cannot make any legal or Constitutional difference: American citizens don’t renounce their Constitutional protections against the U.S. Government when they leave the country. If the President has the legal authority to assassinate U.S. citizens without charges on the ground that they are allegedly plotting against the U.S. when they’re on foreign soil, then shouldn’t the President have this same right for citizens on American soil? Think Progress celebrates the Awlaki assassination as an Obama “success”; would they do the same if the President ordered Nicholson assassinated without charges?

I could, in the ‘I’m Rubber-You’re-Glue’ vein, introduce some conspiracies of my own… Such as the theory that Mitt Romney is covering up federal felonies related to his contradicting claims made to SEC officials. Romney owned a Bermuda-based company for over 15 years which suggests that without further disclosure it may be impossible to tell his actual hidden wealth. Or point out how Bain Capital to invest in a medical-waste disposal company that disposed of aborted fetuses. And:

“In 1991, the Occupational Safety and Health Administration cited its Arkansas operation for 11 workplace safety violations. The facility had not provided employees with sufficient protective gear, and it had kept body parts, fetuses, and dead experimental animals in unmarked storage containers, placing workers at risk.

And though Romney and others are making this merely a “referendum on Obama”, and spreading lies about the tax impact of his healthcare plan, when you compare the projected revenue effect of the individual mandate to the actual revenue effects of other, actually large tax increases, their claims becomeslaughable. The mandate is tiny by comparison.

And most American’s actually support the provisions in ‘Obamacare’:

A recent poll by the Kaiser Family Foundation found Americans split down the middle, with 41 percent approving of the law, and 40 percent saying they didn’t like it. But then Kaiser asked about 12 specific provisions in the legislation, and found that, on average, 63 percent of respondents approved of the nuts and bolts of Obamacare. Of the 12 measures they tested, only one – the controversial mandate to carry health insurance or pay a penalty – received the approval of less than half of Americans (35 percent).

Or consider this divide: while only 12 percent of Republicans had a positive view of the law overall, 47 percent, on average, viewed its specifics favorably.

What most folks don’t know about the law (or have been outright lied to), is that most Americans will be getting subsidy checks, including tax credits for small businesses that offer employee coverage, advanceable tax credits for citizens, the richest Americans paying a fair amount that they can comfortably afford, insurers actually required to spend money on their customers, and larger companies (with 50 or more full-time workers) will have to pay penalties if they don’t provide coverage.

According to the Congressional Budget Office, just 1 percent of the population will pay the mandate penalty, which maxes out at 1 percent of one’s income, and the law will reduce the projected deficit by $210 billion over the next decade.

The bill provides maternity care, mental healthcare and substance abuse treatment, pediatric care, ambulance rides and hospitalization, and new dollars for community health centers.

Yes, the old systems are starting to decay, and will all hopefully be replaced with reasonable solutions. As Chris Hedges writes at Truthdig:

“Civilizations in the final stages of decay are dominated by elites out of touch with reality. … This failure to impose limits cannibalizes natural resources and human communities. This time, the difference is that when we go the whole planet will go with us.”

The Rockerfellers and the Rothschilds are merging their interests, as are the Koch Brothers and Casino mogul Sheldon Adelsonpledging $10 million to their conservative 2012 efforts. And even those that take the fall for massive investment failures and fraud (covering for the super-rich elites) face no jail time and will not have any money clawed back.

This is the most important rule of finance: It really doesn’t matter how badly you screw up; if you’re an important enough person you will never face any real negative consequences, besides a bit of bad press. The best managers know how to delegate large-scale theft and fraud.

So even though Barclay’s has agreed to pay fines related to their price-fixing scamwe won’t be seeing any of that money. There were also huge bid-rigging settlements for Chase, UBS, Bank of America, GE and Wachovia.

Our only slim hope is that they’ll take themselves out, though this is grisly and unjust. Is the 1% going to leap at this as an example of their first casualty in the Class War we nefarious “poors” are waging against them?

Corporate profits are at an all-time high; wages (as a percent of the economy) are at an all-time low, often at or just above the poverty level.

“One reason companies are so profitable is that they’re paying employees less than they ever have as a share of GDP. And that, in turn, is one reason the economy is so weak: Those ‘wages’ are other companies’ revenue,” Henry Blodget, Business Insider. And high unemployment makes workers willing to accept those poverty wages.

Right-wingers from Michele Bachmann to Ron Paul have used high unemployment as an opportunity to call for eliminating the minimum wage entirely, letting companies decide just how little they think their workers are worth. Companies love to claim that if they’re forced to pay more, they’ll have to eliminate jobs, but these numbers show that actually, they’re able to keep wages low and refuse to hire, And the rich are getting ever richer.

Politicians proclaim that they feel your pain while announcing budget cuts that freeze salaries, lay off workers and force more work onto those who remain. CEOs use that same language when explaining why they simply can’t create jobs. Morgan Stanley’s CEO, James Gorman blamed the lousy economy when asked why he hadn’t created the jobs his company had promised the city in exchange for massive tax breaks.

That’s what rich corporations are able to buy with their record profits: politicians who turn around and hand them even more money, in the form of tax breaks that hollow out city and state budgets and force even more austerity and even more social service cuts that fall on the backs of the same underpaid workers.

Corporate taxes are at a 40-year low, with an effective tax rate paid of 12.1 percent. That’s what you can buy when you’d rather pay politicians than your workers.

The Center for American Progress found in a study that as union membership decreases, so does the so-called middle class’s share of national income. The middle class has long served as a buffer between those at the top and those at the bottom. As long as the majority of Americans were comfortable, had decent jobs and pensions, and could send their kids to school, the wealthy could stay wealthy and the poor were pretty much just ignored. And that middle class was built through decades of union agitation, not just for higher wages and health care benefits, but for the eight-hour day, for the weekend, and for safety in the workplace and some job security.

But now the middle class has been hollowed out, many of their jobs being outsourced or automated into nonexistence in the name of profits. Increasingly, there are the super-super-rich, and there are the rest of us.

The far right frames these issues as moral ones, and so should we.

The basic idea behind democracy in America is the idea that citizens care about each other; that they act socially as well as individually to cash out that care, and they try to do as well as they can in doing that both for themselves and for others. They do this by having the government create what we call “the public.” The public provision of things; things for everybody – roads, bridges, sewers, public education and public health, like the Centers for Disease Control. Clean air, clean water, the provision of energy, communications and so on. These are all the sorts of things that you can’t live a life without. A private life or a private enterprise. Every business depends on all of these things. The private depends on the public. That is a moral issue. That is how we care about each other.

Now many are claiming that the toxic economic philosophy of austerity for the poor, deregulated greed and risk-taking for the rich, and blind obedience to authoritarianism, has become it’s own religion (and a very anti-Christian one at that).

“Anyone who believes in indefinite growth in anything physical, on a physically finite planet, is either mad – or an economist.” ~Kenneth Boulding

“Neoclassical economics has become a religion. Because it has a mathematical veneer, and I emphasize the word veneer, they actually believe it’s true. Once you believe something is true, you’re locked into its way of thinking unless there’s something that can break in from the outside and destroy that confidence.” ~Economics professor Steve Keen

“The arguments of economists legitimate social and economic arrangements by providing these arrangements with quasi-religious justification. Economists are thus doing theology while for the most part unaware of that fact.” ~Paul Heyne

Paul Krugman also has some very reasonable choice words on the virtue of selfishness.

But the systems of power continue to peddle and perpetuate their scam of ‘hard work in America.’

Since the 1970s, America’s annual working hours have been steadily increasing. At the same time, middle-class wages have stagnated or declined. Despite this, Americans work more hours than any other Western nation, says Boston University professor Ellen Shell. , and this is bad for the economy and bad for our mental and physical well-being. “…we must push hard against our current practice of celebrating overwork and treat it as the scam it has become,” she says, referring to how the wages of the upper-class have boomed in the last decade.

We’re headed back to the robber baron era, the Gilded Age, and in many ways may already be there.

We have the highest level of income inequality in 90 years, both private and public sector unions are under a concerted attack, and federal and state governments intend to cut deficits by slashing services to the poor. Unregulated corporate greed has historically created economic collapses that the public then has to pay for. Unions are being stamped out, elections are being openly bought and sold, the Supreme Court is heavily partisan towards the financial industry, civil liberties are being violated and protestors shot, votes are being discounted, and minority groups beaten and subjugated.

NYPD is now operating in cahoots with the CIA, using its resources as a vast domestic spy network engaged in surveillance, mapping and infiltration,  stretching from the heart of New York City to the border of Canada—by way of Connecticut, New Jersey and Long Island. Treating basic acts of daily living as potential crimes, disregarding privacy and the freedom of speech and religion. Mild-mannered Muslim citizens, students, cab drivers, business owners, vendros are all fair game, with every minute detail of their lives being recorded. How long before the eyes of scrutiny are turned on the rest of us?

There’s a rich history in this country of suppressing dissent and stripping away civil rights; the WWI Red Scare and “Prostitution” roundups, the Depression-era Bonus Army attack, WWII internment, and most notably, the surveillance and operations against left-leaning political groups in the 1960s (COINTELPRO) and the lawless indefinite detention post 9/11 to today. Anarchists, communists, labor organizers, civil rights organizations and various ethnic groups were all monitored by a succession of “Red Squads.”

Mass arrests accompanied the Republican conventions held in New York in 2004, when 900 people were busted, and in St. Paul in 2008 when 300 were detained, including 30 journalists. In the recent NATO summit held in Chicago at which approximately 70 people were busted over two days, including three for “terrorism.”

Increasingly, steps are being taken to prevent us from making real change.

What’s needed, for starters, is a unified progressive identity, a concerted effort to institutionalize coordination, a common infrastructure capable of formulating clear policy objectives and strategic messages, and a commitment to creating a powerful, unified movement beyond isolated campaigns. a new American Dream, a New Progressive Movement.

“America needs a different story. . . . So let me say what I think up front: The leaders and thinkers and activists who honestly tell that story and speak passionately of the moral and religious values it puts in play will be the first political generation since the New Deal to win power back for the people.”

~Bill Moyers

We need ideas for dethroning GDP, transcending consumerism, transforming corporations, revitalizing communities, building a different system for money and finance, and more.

Yes Magazine illustrates a vision of America the possible, a manifesto on the “new economy.” The following transformations hold the key to moving to a new political economy. Consider each as a transition from today to tomorrow.

  • Economic growth: from growth fetish to post-growth society, from mere GDP growth to growth in human welfare and democratically determined priorities.
  • The market: from near laissez-faire to powerful market governance in the public interest.
  • The corporation: from shareholder primacy to stakeholder primacy, from one ownership and motivation model to new business models and the democratization of capital.
  • Money and finance: from Wall Street to Main Street, from money created through bank debt to money created by government.
  • Social conditions: from economic insecurity to security, from vast inequities to fundamental fairness.
    Indicators: from GDP (“grossly distorted picture”) to accurate measures of social and environmental health and quality of life.
  • Consumerism: from consumerism and affluenza to sufficiency and mindful consumption, from more to enough.
  • Communities: from runaway enterprise and throwaway communities to vital local economies, from social rootlessness to rootedness and solidarity.
  • Dominant cultural values: from having to being, from getting to giving, from richer to better, from separate to connected, from apart from nature to part of nature, from transcendent to interdependent, from today to tomorrow.
  • Politics: from weak democracy to strong, from creeping corporatocracy and plutocracy to true popular sovereignty.
  • Foreign policy and the military: from American exceptionalism to America as a normal nation, from hard power to soft, from military prowess to real security.

There’s work to be done together. But there’s democracy in the air.

Stranger in a Strange Land 2012-07-07: Fusion by The Stranger on Mixcloud

~The Stranger
thestranger@earthling.net